On losing your voice - and how to reclaim it

It's been a while. Precisely 6 years since the last post. 

This time has seen us through a lot. 

Post graduations, weddings, therapy, medication, a pandemic, a cat, a garden, taller siblings, and more gray hairs.

And somewhere along the way, I seem to have lost my voice. 

Do you know what happens to thoughts unexpressed? 

It's like putting lentils in a pressure cooker. Turn up the heat, and eventually, you're still left with lentils. But just super mushed up. 

My thoughts and words were very mushed up. 'Are' very mushed up. 

But here I can safely say no one will read my thoughts. As I lay watching Meghan Markle self-reporting her agonies during her time as a Royal on the "Harry and Meghan" Netflix documentary, I realized I could try and take back some control of my narrative. 

Don't get me wrong, I'm no Meghan. But her journey has definitely inspired me to find my voice. 

And so, on this platform, where I know no one will come seeking my words, I put myself out there.

I suppose one has to start somewhere to get somewhere. And so I'm prepared for my voice to sound bad for a while before I can produce any melodies. 

This isn't going to be one of my usual monologues. Brevity and I must befriend each other. So on that note, I will find topics to let my voice be heard more. 

For example - something concrete I can think of doing in that direction is to write a blurb for "Freakonomics" and "People I Mostly Admire" podcast episodes on LinkedIn. Take what I love, share with the rest of the world why I love it, and start thought-provoking discussions. 

I may be too serious. I may be slightly boring. But I am me, flaws and all. And I am worthy of the space I take up in the world by virtue simply of my existence. 

It all starts right here, with me, speaking up.